My most recent adventure, and what God showed me in Exodus...

   Here we are and it's October already! It's crazy how time flies! Since the fall has begun, I've started C-SBS, the Chronological School of Biblical Studies here at YWAM Los Angleles, and God is changing my life day by day, book by book.
   What is this whole C-SBS thing? Well, we are besically equipped with some wonderful tools to study the bible that help us understand the people who the bible was written to, their culture, the stars of the story, and the way the truths of who God has been to these people, relate to us now. We like to call these our timeless truths. After we learn how to use the tools, we are set free to study God's word, day by day and discover Him. Soooo amazing!
   Our school started 3 weeks ago, and I was not prepared for the way the bible could change me. My classmates and staff are incredible, and I feel so blessed! I don't think I could be with a more amazing group of people... Together, we read God's word, help keep the base running...keep each other running around the base, get a little sleep, and drink a whole lot of coffee, as God takes us deeper and deeper into His heart. It is truley incredible.
 

First Day of Class!

Our own Mt Sinai

Us at the Beach!

   Here is a little something God spoke to me while in the book of Exodus...

   There He stands...quietly watching me as I walk for the first time. My steps are wobbly, but He knows they will one day be sure. He looks forward to the days, when my eyes will be opened, and we will walk together.

   He speaks truth and life into my ear..”I love you.” He is there singing over me as I sleep at night. His song over me is continuous as I sleep through years of nights and live through countless bright and sunshiny days.

   He was there when the car crashed, and glass shattered; fear paralyzing me as I screamed. His hand protected my life. He brought me out unharmed.

He was there the moment I was conceived, there the moment my mom found out about me... unexpected as I was. He was there, planning and encouraging my life into existence in spite of the fact I was unwanted by some. He has great plans for me.

   He was there that night, when the songs floated melodiously into my heart, and the Holy Spirit moved in me, filling me with tears of compassion, and I was too young even to know that it was Him, moving so deeply in me.

   He was there when depression and shame threatened to drown out every last drop of hope and life. When fear overwhelmed me and I could hardly bear the thought of another day.

   He was there when I stood alone on the porch, heart-broken watching him drive away from the last time, all my hopes and dreams crashing down around me.

   When I felt unseen, He was there. When I felt rejected, He was there. When I felt lonelier than lonely, He was there then too. He held me when I cried out and was too blind to see that He was there, holding me.

   All my life He has been there, because, you see. God is patient. He never forces Himself on us. But, He pursues us, endlessly, lovingly, passionately, and no matter how many times we fail to notice, He is still right there. He never stops pursuing our hearts. God waits to be wanted,

   We might look, and be looking right at God, but miss Him altogether. That doesn't mean He isn't there though. Maybe it simply means we have not turned. It is in the turning, in the taking time to change the focus of our eyes, the focus of our hearts, that we can move beyond looking, into really seeing.

   Why is this so important? Because seeing God changes everything. When we finally take time to acknowledge His presence in our lives, it opens the door wide for Him to speak to us, to heal our hearts, to use our hands as extensions of His love! But how could we learn to do this if we fail to take time to turn and see Him?

   How loving is God that He would always be there, even on the days when we never take the time to turn and see Him. His grace covers, and when we go to bed at the end of a day walking blind, He wakes us up to another sunrise. Another whisper. Another invitation to see.

   I want my life to be marked by turning. I want to make it priority to stop and listen...to look in order to see God in my own life, because God is ready, only waiting for people who will be willing to turn aside and see that He is there.

   God has wonderful, big and beautiful plans...plans too amazing for us to even begin to imagine, and Oh       God, help me not to miss them by walking blind.

    You appeared to Moses in a flaming bush...He looked, and didn't realize it was you who was there...not until He turned aside to see, did you call his name and reveal your plans of life, and redemption and deliverance you wanted to bring through him. What If he never would've turned? Never stopped long enough to hear your voice? Would you have picked someone else? How many more lives would have been lost along the way? How much more pain would've been inflicted? How many more tears shed?

   Teach me to turn. Teach me to see. Teach me to be your hands of love wherever you would call me. And remind me, when I am discouraged, to look behind me and see the fingerprints that you have left on the road my feet have walked. You were there.